Many, many clients ask me how I chose the name Zoë.
The short answer is, I didn’t.
You would think that a provider selects her own name when she enters this business. In an industry where consent and autonomy are arguably very important, an escort should have some say in her alternate persona. Especially one she’s expected to live and breathe, potentially for years.
Much like how you don’t get to choose your name at birth, your escort name is often left in the hands of other people, like the owner of Nadya’s VIPs.
When I was hired by Nadya’s back in 2014, I remember presenting them with my chosen name.
I had spent considerable time scouring baby books, movie credits and even tombstones to find the right fit. Despite my grand efforts, the best I could do was Olivia – extremely basic but certainly in vogue in the 2010’s.
My agency told me then that I had it all wrong. They would choose my name, not me! It would also take at least a week for them to decide. God only knows what they do in that time, but they made it sound like a very involved and serious process.
It’s a strange feeling, waiting to be given a new name.
I can think of no other time this happens other than at birth and even then there are some notable differences. Above all, your birth name is with you from the very start of your consciousness. It has always been there and likely always will be.
It’s not the same for us as escorts. All of us go through an adjustment period where we need to learn and adapt to our new persona.
It starts by simply remembering the right name to say in different contexts (which I still haven’t mastered). It then transcends to a deeper psychological shift. In my case, I started to ascribe certain qualities to one of my identities, but not the other. Whenever I want to feel sexy and flirty, I make a conscious effort to channel Zoe. When I want to feel serious and grounded, I inhabit the “real” me.
It is truly a very odd experience and one that’s difficult to explain…
The Birth of Zoë
Many, many clients ask me how I chose the name Zoë.
The short answer is, I didn’t.
You would think that a provider selects her own name when she enters this business. In an industry where consent and autonomy are arguably very important, an escort should have some say in her alternate persona. Especially one she’s expected to live and breathe, potentially for years.
Much like how you don’t get to choose your name at birth, your escort name is often left in the hands of other people, like the owner of Nadya’s VIPs.
When I was hired by Nadya’s back in 2014, I remember presenting them with my chosen name.
I had spent considerable time scouring baby books, movie credits and even tombstones to find the right fit. Despite my grand efforts, the best I could do was Olivia – extremely basic but certainly in vogue in the 2010’s.
My agency told me then that I had it all wrong. They would choose my name, not me! It would also take at least a week for them to decide. God only knows what they do in that time, but they made it sound like a very involved and serious process.
It’s a strange feeling, waiting to be given a new name.
I can think of no other time this happens other than at birth and even then there are some notable differences. Above all, your birth name is with you from the very start of your consciousness. It has always been there and likely always will be.
It’s not the same for us as escorts. All of us go through an adjustment period where we need to learn and adapt to our new persona.
It starts by simply remembering the right name to say in different contexts (which I still haven’t mastered). It then transcends to a deeper psychological shift. In my case, I started to ascribe certain qualities to one of my identities, but not the other. Whenever I want to feel sexy and flirty, I make a conscious effort to channel Zoe. When I want to feel serious and grounded, I inhabit the “real” me.
It is truly a very odd experience and one that’s difficult to explain…
The start of my adjustment period came 8 days after that conversation with my agency.
At the end of the week, they came back to me and solemnly christened me Zoë. I was appalled.
We all have certain names that have been ruined for us because of some negative association. I truly feel for all the Karens, Beckys and Chads out there in the world.
Zoe is one of those spoiled names. Every Zoe I’ve ever met (and probably ever will meet) has been an absolute nutcase. Whenever I hear the name, I think of some unhinged, unattractive person who will stalk you on Facebook and slash your tires in the dead of night.
I will say that Zoë was made slightly more palatable by the “ë” at the end, which at least brought to mind someone hot like Zoë Kravitz.
However, even the umlaut made me feel a bit uncomfortable. That’s because it was part of a larger strategy to market me as German. The agency apparently thought no one would want to book an American, which struck me even then as absolutely ridiculous.
It isn’t a total lie to say that I’m German but I’m clearly American first and foremost. No amount of umlauts is going to hide that fact. But this was another battle I swiftly lost, as you can see below…
I’m not sure at what point Zoë went from a name that made me inwardly cringe to one I really loved.
I suppose the more empowered I felt and the greater my success in the industry, the more positive I became about my name. All I know is that after ten years, Zoe has become a very important part of my identity. In fact, one my favorite gifts to this day is a “Z” necklace I received from a client. I wear it whenever I want to remind myself of my secret escort superpowers.
If I have any regrets now about my name, it’s only that it’s too short.
I have learned the hard way that many escort sites need a minimum of four letters for their search feature. This is easily solved by adding a last name, but I’ve never wanted to make that change. It’s important to me that I come across as down-to-earth and approachable; that’s how I am in real life. I therefore dispense with any type of formality that creates emotional distance with my clients.
To make myself more searchable, I decided to add “Indy” to the front of my name (signifying “independent”). Admittedly, all this has done is confuse people in emails. Don’t worry if you accidentally call me Indy….loads of people do and it doesn’t offend me in the slightest!
I will finish with a little fun fact: when I see a client address me as Zoë in their intro email, this is a telltale sign that he’ll be a great client. Someone who notices such a small detail and spends those extra few seconds to get the ë right will always stand out. Lord knows, even I’m too lazy to add it in!
Until next time… xx
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